Troublesome Blondes
by suikaneko
Summary: Shikamaru and Naruto go to a party one night. /shikanaru
1. Chapter 1

"Shika~chan!"

Shikamaru couldn't seem to spend one day in this village without running into at least **one** troublesome blonde. There was Temari-who was here all _too_ often- Tsunade, the goddamn Hokage, and Ino, who was the object of his annoyance at current.

He glanced over his shoulder only to receive a chakra intensified slap to the face. He hit the ground before he'd realized what had happened.

"What the hell, Ino," he groaned, sitting up. "What's your problem?"

Ino crossed her arms, turning up her nose at him. "**That** was for leaving me at the bar last night! What could have happened to me, _little old me_, surrounded by all of those men?" Shikamaru gave her his signature 'are you stupid?' look.

"You're a fucking **kunoichi**. I'm pretty sure you can handle yourself."

Ino shrugged. "Whatever! You're treating me to ramen anyway!" So, of course, as was the norm for anyone in their year, they walked to the Ichiraku Ramen Shop - which, reminded him of yet another troublesome blonde...

As Shikimaru and Ino walked up to the ramen stand, Naruto sat noisily slurping a giant bowl of ramen. "HOT HOT..._mmm_... **HOT**!"

Naruto heard a snicker behind him, Ino scoffed, "What are you doing Naruto! You're such an slob!" Shikimaru avoided the conflict and rubbed his nose.

Naruto glanced over his shoulder. "SHUT UP INO!" He continued slurping ramen while defending himself, "This", slurp, "Is", slurp "the best ramen!" He teared up a little, maybe from the heat of the broth or maybe because of his love for ramen. Most likely both.

Shikamaru sat at the bar and ordered for himself. He knew there was a way out of having to pay for Ino's food. Initiating strategy one hundred and four- Ino lifted a finger to tell the old man behind the counter what she wanted. "Beef specia-" Shikamaru coughed to cut the girl off. "What is it, lazy ass?"

He just shrugged. "Beef has a lot of calories, doesn't it?" Ino glared at him incredulously. "What are you trying to say?" He glanced at her stomach and gave her a look. "I'm gaining weight aren't I? Shit! I'm going for a run!" And, with that, she was gone.

Naruto was finishing off the last part of his ramen and was oblivious to the recent occurrence.

"Hey Shikimaru! I didn't know you liked ramen!" Naruto greeted Shikimaru then looked around..."Where'd Ino go? She usually gets the beef ramen...mm..beef ramen.." Naruto's stomach growled and he stared at his empty bowl. With hope he peered into his froggy wallet which let out an empy puff of dust.

The Ramen guy avoided looking at that pathetic face Naruto makes when he's out of money. That kid wasn't getting another free bowl out of him!

Shikamaru glanced at the blonde. "I don't really care. Food is food...how many bowls have you eaten anyway ?"

Naruto flopped onto the counter and blubbered "Only two bowls~ wahhh~ so hunrgy!"

The Ramen guy looked alarmed at Naruto's whining "I can give him just...one more bowl..." he reached for the noodles but then his hand slammed down "n-no! No more!" The ramen man cried and quickly closed the ramen stand, a little sign fell down saying "Gone on Vacation"

Shikimaru looked up in surprise(as surprised as Shikimaru could look). Naruto continued to whine, a puddle of snot pooling around him, not noticing that his hands got smashed under the shop door.

[Shikamaru wasn't...particularly sure what was going on, but this pathetic thing didn't really work for him- not on Naruto. "Stop your whining and have mine." He pushed the bowl over to him. He got up and started to leave. He figured Naruto would probably notice his hands being trapped under that door in 3...2...

"AHHHHHH! WHERE DID THIS DOOR COME FROM!?" Naruto flailed and tried to shake out his hands, suddenly he jumped up and grabbed Shikimaru by the collar, "It was you, wasn't it Shikimaru!?" Naruto spewed some last minute excuse as to why Shikimaru would do this. "You-You're trying to smash my hands so that I can't become hokage!"

"Naruto, I get it. You're hungry, so you're delirious. Just let go of me...go eat the ramen, and I'll just be on my way..." He lifted his hands, trying to calmly reason with the ramen deprived Naruto.

What Naruto heard Shikimaru say was..."Naruto, blah blah. Blah blah, blah blah blaaah, Blah...Go Eat the Ramen, blah..." Naruto perked up, "Whatever you say Shikimaru ol' pal!" He raced over to the ramen stand and clapped his hands together, a little painfully, "Itadakimasu!" Naruto picked up his chopsticks and began eating...he picked up his chop sticks and...he picked up…"GAHH! Why can't I pick these up!" Naruto fumbled with his chopsticks, his hands were pretty messed up from the door slamming on them.

Shikamaru chuckled a little as he walked away from the ramen shop. Naruto still amused him in the way that only Naruto could, despite being however many years older. Of course, he'd never voice any of this, but he was definitely glad that even after everything...Naruto was still Naruto.

Interrupting his thoughts, he remembered something important. If he wasn't mistaken, he was pretty sure that Sakura was having that party tonight. He knew he wouldn't be living much longer if he didn't at least pop his head in at the party and let a few people see him there.

Naruto plunged his face into the bowl of ramen…inhaling broth and noodles...this was what happiness was.

Suddenly he felt a smack on his back which knocked him out of his ramen wonderland and caused him to cough out a few noodles. "Bleh! Bleh bleh...!" Naruto held his throat coughing.

"Naruto! What are you doing.." a familiar voice said.

Naruto stopped choking enough to look up and identify the person. He wheezed out "s-sakura..?" a noodle was hanging out of his nose.

"You're such a mess Naruto! Did you forget you promised to help me set up my party?!"

He inhaled the stray noodle through his nose, "Oh yeah! That! That's tonight?"

"Of course it's tonight, can't you remember anything? Same old Naruto..." she said as she dragged him by the ear away from the ramen stand.


	2. Chapter 2

That night, everyone was at the party. Sakura had meant it to be some kind of "reunion" or something, and everyone was out of their normal ninja clothes and in semi-formal attire. There was alcohol galore, lounge areas- Sakura (and Naruto) had set it up quite nicely. Of course, Shikamaru arrived late, of course, and everyone was already...pretty hammered. He sighed. "Troublesome..."

Naruto stumbled around with a streamer draped over his neck and a party hat on his head. "Hey Shika~ you should try some of this water! It's really good! Hahahaha" Naruto held up a bottle of vodka smiling at Shikamaru.

Aw jeez...Naruto drunk? That was something he was sure he could have gone his whole life without seeing. Nonetheless, he was fine with getting a little buzz. "Sure, I'll have some of the 'water.'"

Naruto wrapped an arm around his buddy's shoulder and forced the bottle into Shikamaru's mouth tilting it upwards. "Hahaha pretty good isn't it?!"

Shikamaru took a way larger gulp than he meant to. Stumbling backwards and wiping his mouth with the back of his sleeve, he coughed a little, "Right..."

The drunk one laughed heartily and led his friend to somewhere else in the party. Shikimaru groaned as he was forced to follow. Over at the snack table was a familiar round backside though. Naruto yelled a little as he swayed "Yoooo! Choooooji! Look who's here!"

"Naruto, he's right there, he can hear you..." Shikamaru took the bottle of vodka from Naruto and took another dose- because that's what it was at this point, medicine to help him get through this party.

Naruto frowned as Shikamaru took away his silly water. Choji turned around with a handful of chips, he waved at Shikimaru "Hey."

Choji smiled seeing two of his friends. Choji was surprisingly not drunk. Either he hadn't had anything to drink or it was his sheer size that allowed him to drink mass quantities of alcohol without feeling the effects.

Ino walked past the crowd of guys, looking not as confident as she usually did.

Chouji looked over, then at Shikamaru. "Do you know what's up with her?"

Shikamaru looked back at Ino who was wearing baggy clothes. Ino walked up and asked Sakura if she wanted to work out with her tomorrow. Watching the scene he contemplated it, but instead of telling the others what he'd done, he just shrugged, and that bottle was back at his lips. "Beats me."

Naruto patted Shikimaru on the back "Ahaha who ever knows what's up with Ino!" Naruto slumped a little suddenly feeling tired, his arm pulling Shikamaru down a little.

"Naruto, I think you've had a little too much." Shikamaru said, glancing over at him.

His head sagged as staggered a little. He undraped his arm from Shikimaru's neck and walked into the center of the party and jumped on a table making a huge noise "I'M NARUTO UZUMAKI AND I'M GOING TO BECOME HOKAGE! DATTEBAYO!" Naruto stood defiantly and smirked at Shikimaru. That'll show him! Not sure what point he was making, but he made a point!

'Don't look at me when you do something like that!' Shikamaru pinched in between his eyebrows, becoming increasingly overwhelmed by Naruto's personality.

Shikamaru looked around the other party goers. Everything got silent, and then everyone just wrote it off as a Naruto thing to do.

Naruto laughed and jumped off the table, walkin back over towards Shikimaru smiling. Shikimaru frowned and looked a little scared, a shadow loomed behind Naruto.

"**NARUTO**! What do you think you're doing?!" Sakura punched Naruto on the head causing him to fall over. He held his head rocking back and forth on the ground. "Sakur_aaaaaa_...what was that for..."

"For being an idiot! Shikamaru, get him out of here!" Sakura ordered. "Do I have to-" Shikamaru didn't finish whining before Sakura gathered chakra in her palms. She didn't have to say another word. "Come on, Naruto...I'll...get you some ramen..."

Naruto glared up at Sakura, imitating someone's face, "What a drag" He turned to Shikamaru and laughed proudly. Sakura built up more chakra as Naruto hurried Shikimaru and himself out the door, still laughing to himself, "Hehehehahahaha Ramen! Wahoo!"


	3. Chapter 3

The two made their way over to Shikamaru's place. The apartment was very bare, but clean. There was a shogi board on his dining room table, and a bowl in the sink from breakfast that morning. "Try not to puke on anything," he commanded.

"Shikimaru you funny…" Naruto swayed back and forth his head feeling dizzy. He found a pillow somewhere and managed to lie down. Shikimaru glanced over and saw Naruto laughing drunkenly, curled up in his futon. He rolled his eyes, and sat at his table, setting up the board and playing shogi with himself.

The other boy continued laughing until he noticed Shikamaru was no longer paying attention to him. He inch wormed over to Shikamaru. "Hey" he pouted a little. "Lemme play too…"

"Fine, whatever."

Naruto crawled into the chair. He sat and looked serious, he stroked his chin pondering his next move..he sat there for atleast 5 minutes..finally naruto picked up a piece, Shikamaru was surprised by what he predicted would be his next move, this was truly an advanced strategy..."_uu__**UAAHHHH**_!" Naruto flipped the shogi board "I don't even unnerstan' this game!" Pieces went flying everywhere, a few bounced off of Shikamaru's forehead.

"Naruto..." He sighed heavily.

"Let's do something else." Naruto crossed his arms defiantly looking bored.

"I'm going to sleep. Goodnight." Shikamaru stood up from the table, making his way to the futon.

Naruto blinked in surprised his mouth a gape. "But...but...Shikamaru..." He closed his mouth a little and began drunkenly trying to pick up the shogi pieces.

"Go to bed, Naruto."

He picked up a shogi piece and stumbled after Shikamaru.

"Why are you following me?" He asked, sighing. But he didn't hesitate in taking off his shirt, getting ready for sleep.

"I picked thissup for ya…" Naruto uncurled Shikamaru's fingers and placed the game piece in his hand. Shikamaru looked down at him considing that he wasn't such an annoying guy all the time. Just particularly now. He was just very drunk. They locked eyes for a moment as Shikamaru pondered, before Naruto had another fit of drunken distraction. He glanced up to Shikamaru shirtless and was surprised by how buff he was. Naruto suddenly whipped off his shirt in competition and began comparing abs. "Wha-!" Naruto poked Shikamaru's stomach and then poked his own.

Shikamaru found this occurence troublesome, but went along with it anyway, it was better than Naruto throwing the shogi board. He smirked. "You can't even compare. I've been training against Chouji for years."

"Ooohhhhh!" Naruto was amazed by this. "I'm going to beat you someday!" And by someday, he meant today. Naruto got on the floor and began doing crunches…1…2..3...foouu..ohh...he felt something gurgle in his stomach. He groaned and rolled over. He didn't feel well.

"Naruto! If you're going to puke, go to the bathroom!"

Belching, he stumbled off somewhere...he realized he didn't know where the bathroom was..."S-shikamaru...bleh..." Naruto called out feebily..his whole head spinning. Naruto felt lost. Luckily there wasn't much in Shikamaru's aparment for him to run into, he bumped into a wall and stumbled over his feet.

Hearing Naruto call out for him, he groaned. "Everything and everyone in my life is troublesome." He grabbed Naruto by the shoulders and led him to the bathroom. "Kneel."

Out of the spinning, Naruto felt warm hands hold him steady and guided him, he followed. He was told to kneel and he did. His vision fixed upon the round seat near his face...

"Just let it go..." Shikamaru instructed with a hint of concern in his voice, holding onto Naruto's shoulder to keep him steady.

The blonde lurched forward and three bowls of partially digested ramen spewed forth..his face was pale except for his flustered rosy cheeks..he panted softly...coughing up the rest.

"This is why you shouldn't drink so much. And look, you wasted all of that ramen..."

Naruto looked up at Shikimaru and wiped his mouth. His blue eyes were watery, his mouth acidic and burning. He felt embarrassed about what had just happened. His cheeks were red and he looked as if he might cry.

"Don't...cry..." He couldn't handle seeing Naruto look so pathetic like this…please don't cry.

"I'll never drink water again!" Naruto hugged Shikamaru close.

"Naruto...you should...brush your teeth..." He tried pulling away from the blonde.

Naruto stumbled to get up, somehow making his way to the sink and began using the brunette's toothbrush without much lifted his hand to protest. But instead, he just sighed and left the hastily brushed his teeth seeing that Shikamaru was leaving. "Hey! Wait up!"

"What do you want now?" He made his way to his futon, crawling i.

"Sorry." Naruto stood beside him, looking a little upset.

"I'm going to bed now, Naruto."

Naruto lied down on the floor beside Shikamaru's futon, watching him close his eyes.

"You're going to feel awful tomorrow morning. You can sleep here with me."

Naruto scooted onto the matress. "Sorry...I know I've made your day...troublesome..." He said sleepily snuggling into Shikamaru's chest.

Shikamaru, again, just let it happen. But he would never admit how nice it felt..."Just go to sleep."

Naruto passed out immediately, thankful for the warm bed and for an escape from the spinning in his head. Snoring quietly, he mumbled something about ramen and his sleeping hat, moving slightly in his sleep. Shikamaru chuckled a little before dozing off himself.


End file.
